Embarrassing Lyrics: Jam-Packed

Here’s our fourth installment in the Embarrassing Lyrics saga!

Compiled by John Jude Farragut.  All lyrics (except otherwise noted) come from www.lyricsmode.com.

“Put the ‘X’ in ‘Sex,” by Kiss

Love’s like a muscle and you make me wanna flex

‘Nuff said.

“Candyman,” by Christina Aguilera

He’s a one stop, gotcha hot, makin’ all the panties drop
He’s a one stop, got me hot, makin’ my “uh” pop
He’s a one stop shop with a real big “uh”

You just have to laugh at this one!

“I Love New York,” by Madonna

I don’t like cities
But I like New York
Other places
Make me feel like a dork

You can almost hear the blonde alert buzzing with this one.

“Honey, I’m Home,” by Shania Twain
My panty line shows
Got a run in my hose
My hair went flat
Man, I hate that

She’s a brunette, but you can still hear the blonde alert buzzing like crazy!

“So Yesterday,” by Hilary Duff

If the light is off, then it isn’t on

It doesn’t get much more blonde than this.

“Bad,” by Michael Jackson

Your butt is mine

It’s bad enough, but it’s even worse coming from him.

“Remedy,” by Jason Mraz

If you’ve gots the poison I’ve gots the remedy

Sounds like he got his English lessons from Rugrats.

“Life,” by Des’ree

I don’t want to see a ghost
It’s the sight that I fear most
I’d rather have a piece of toast
And watch the evening news

‘Nuff said.

“Fergalicious,” by Fergie

All the time I turn around brothers gather round
Always looking at me up and down looking at my (Uh)

Maybe your (Uh) needs to be retracted, hmm?

“Yahhh!” by Soulja Boy

When a motherf**ka be in your face
Just on your nerves, talkin sh*t
And you just don’t wanna hear it
Just be like “Yahhh, B*tch, Yahhh!”
(Hey, SoulJa Boy, can I get your autograph?) Yahhh, B*tch, Yahhh!
(Yo, Arab, I really like you, man) Yahhh, B*tch, Yahhh!
(Are there any 30 boyz that…) Yah, Yah, B*tch, Yah Yahhh!
(Yeah, I was wonderin, can I be on your next…) Yahhh, Yahhh, B*tch!

Really, when it resorts to screaming in people’s faces, hip-hop doesn’t get much worse.

“A*s Like That,” by Eminem

I ain’t never seen an a*s like that
The way you move it, you make my pee-pee go
Doing, doing, doing

I stand corrected.

“War Song,” by Culture Club
I have to give credit to Spinner.com for this one.  What they wrote gets a “Very Well Put!” award.

War is stupid
And people are stupid

We wrote a song just like this in seventh grade, but the next line was, “And your mom is stupid.”

“Africa,” by Toto

I know that I must do what’s right
Sure as Kilimanjaro rises like Olympus above the Serengeti

Sounds like Toto must take geography lessons.

And, to complete our Embarrassing Lyrics cornucopia, I decided to…

“Save the Best for Last,” by Vanessa Williams

Sometimes the snow comes down in June
Sometimes the sun goes ’round the moon

‘Nuff said.

Hope you enjoyed this list of lyrical blunders.  Want more?  Keep your eyes out for the next installment!